Tattered Past

Tattered Past: My ongoing journey through genealogy, history, writing, self-exploration and art. ~~~ Rita Ackerman

Tuesday, July 31, 2012

Remember When: Fears

I'm very young, standing in the middle of an auditorium with wooden floors.
 There is some event happening and there are quite a few people although it isn't crowded.
People are standing around here and there. Perhaps it is a family reunion or something like that.
No entertainment that I can see or hear.

All I can think about are those big heaters hanging from the ceiling in each corner. 
They scare me to death.
I have to keep an eye on them.

This one was in the lobby of the Cottonwood Hotel and brought back that little girl standing in the middle of the auditorium scared those big ugly things were going to do something bad.

I don't remember why they scared me; I think it was more than just having one fall.
Perhaps I thought there was something in there, they are kind of cage like. Or maybe I was afraid one would blow up. There was something in my child head that comes back to me whenever I see one of these big old heaters.

Later I will do some stream of consciousness writing about this.

Perhaps as I think and write more about the experience the details will come. I'll be able to understand that little girl I faintly remember.

Do you have childhood fears that come to you at strange times. Memories that are just snapshots of emotion? Write about them.


  1. Those heaters look like monsters waiting to gobble up a child. No wonder you were scared. I think I might have been sorta scared of the dark. Now I like to sleep in the total dark! But I'm still scared of elevators.

    1. Some elevators bother me. I don't remember problems with the dark but I don't like closet doors left open.

  2. it is so eerie when one of those memories surfaces; always so unexpected and then sticks in your head for days, especially if you can't figure it out. i do the same with a snatch of a song line or poem or prose. But smells are the most evocative for me.

    1. Yes. It's funny to catch these glimpses. I'm trying to learn to write them all down but it doesn't always happen. Thank you for your comment.

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